Brotherly Love
by Evilpyecat1987
Summary: De-anon from the kink meme. I wrote this awhile back. The NA brothers exchange some not-so-loving banter. England intervenes. Warnings for strong language, fighting, and name-calling.


_This is a fill I did on the Kink Meme awhile back. The anon wanted banter. I did my best. I went back and did a couple of changes to dialogue and punctuation, but it's still 99% original fill. I hope you enjoy this, I really do... going back and reading it, I'm caught between giggling and sobbing hysterically, both in humor and embarrassment. Let me know what you think!_

**Hetalia is the property of Himaruya Hidekaz and affiliated publishers. I make no profit from this story. It is for entertainment purposes only!**

_**Warning: Strong language, fighting, and name calling. I ask that if you object to any comments made, please keep in mind this was written for anon's pleasure. There may be some errors in this due to copy-and-paste from the web to Notepad and then uploading here. I apologize in advance.**_

* * *

**"Brotherly Love"**

America, Canada, and England had come together for a bit of family bonding time . Seeing as the latest meeting had been held in London, it had made sense when England proposed they come over and have a movie night. This was a ritual they did every time a world meeting was held. It helped to reinforce the ties they had with each other on a personal basis.

So they had all piled up in the living room, the older nation on the couch while the younger ones sat on the floor by his feet. Snacks and beverages had been gathered and passed out. The lights were dimmed, and everyone made themselves comfortable.

"So, you two ready for the movie to start?" England gestured to the television with the remote.

They nodded, so he pressed play and sat back.

But there was something different this time. Usually America and Canada were all over each other, laying in a two-nation doggy pile. It was an endearing sight that he never grew tired of.

But tonight they were sitting with their arms crossed, his legs the divider between them, neither one saying or looking at the other. From what he understood, they were arguing over the results of a recent game. It had resulted in a tie, but neither one would give an inch to the other. They both believed their team should have won, and it had descended into a full-out sibling squabble.

Throughout the first half of the movie, they didn't so much as breathe in each other's direction, although from time to time one's hand or leg would stray too far over in the other's space, and a brief shoving match would ensue.

Each time England would whack them with a pillow to break them up.

Now they had reached the middle point, and England wanted more tea. He hit the pause button and stood, stretching and sighing.

"I'm going to go put the kettle on. Afterwards we'll continue, okay?"

The two on the floor nodded again, not a word being spoken. Rolling his eyes, England stepped over Matthew, and made his way to the kitchen. He grabbed the kettle from the stove, filled it with tap water, and set it back on the burner. He turned it on, and was about to head to the cupboard for the tea itself when he heard angry voices coming from the den. Frowning, he crept his way back out of the kitchen to eavesdrop in the doorway. He nearly died with suppressed laughter as the two exchanged words.

The twins stood facing each other, glaring with all their might. Canada was currently speaking.

"You know, I'd really like to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my own ass!", He snapped at his brother.

"For the love of god, how can you not?!" America threw his hands in the air. "You know, sometimes I wonder if you're about to go on the rag. It's like you put extra effort into being a class-A bitch."

Canada gaped, and jabbed him in the chest. "Excuse me, but the last time I checked, it was better to be a bitch than a whore." He flicked him with the finger, and turned to walk away.

It was America's turn to gape.

"Now wait one damn minute! I'm not the one flinging it out both pants legs for every dick available. If anyone here is a whore, that would be YOU." Propping his hands on his hips, he smirked.

Canada spun around, and stepped right up in his face. "Call me a bitch and a whore if you want to Alfred, but at least I'm not fat!" He gestured to America's body. "You know, if we had of thought about it, we could have used your ass for the playing field."

"Oh, here we go with the fat jokes again! You know, acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger, bro."

"Bitch, please! Second largest country here, you know." Canada snapped his fingers, and pointed at the door. "The auditions for Free Willy are that way. Get to steppin'."

"Better to be fat than ugly, asshole!"

"W-What?! Did you just call me ugly?!" Canada shoved America.

Arthur frowned, the situation going from bad to worse in an instant, no longer amused. "Oh god, don't let them get into a fight in the middle of my living room," he thought. He had antiques in there!

"Yeah, what about it?!" America shoved Canada back,

"We're twins, idiot!", Canada shouted, shoving him yet again, this time making America stumble back. "If I'm ugly, then you are too! I mean, honestly, how long did it take for you to come up with that one?!"

"Fuck you, I'm hot as hell!"

America lunged at Canada, tackling him to the ground.

Canada rolled them over, straddling his chest. He grabbed a handful of his hair, and pulled as hard as he could. "You know, I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a better comeback than that!"

Howling with rage, America flailed his arms for a moment, then reached up and got a handful of Canada's hair as well. He yanked down on it, making his brother tip forward. And then they were fighting, rolling around the living room floor, pulling hair and clawing faces, both intent on being the winner.

England stood there and watched them for a few minutes, growing more and more annoyed by the minute. It was when they bumped a table and sent one of his Victorian era vases to the ground in a crash that he decided they had fought enough. He stalked over to where they were currently laying, kicking and shrieking furiously. Watching them closely, he waited until he got an opening, and reached out, grabbing some hair of his own.

Their ahoges, to be exact.

Both twins froze mid-swing, unable to move or speak. Their ahoges were extremely sensitive, and had been used on more than one occasion to subdue them whenever they would be in a fight.

Arthur glared down at them, giving the locks a firm tug. The boys whimpered in response.

"Now, I'm going to say this once, and once only!" He began maneuvering them off of each other, the two moving in opposite directions.

"You are grown countries, with responsibilities and citizens to look out for. But here you are, acting like a pair of teenage brats, having it out over a damn game of Hockey!"

America and Canada were now sitting up on their knees, their eyes gazing up at the elder nation with pitiful expressions. But they didn't dare ask for release.

"This is what you are going to do, and yes, you WILL do it. Or I'm going to show you some of my own inner bitch!"

Blue and Violet orbs widened in fear. Oh god, what was going to happen?!

"You want to act like children? Then you shall be treated as such."

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*one hour later*

England sat on the couch, munching away happily at a plate of scones, sipping his tea with contentment. It was always so nice to have a quiet evening with a good movie.

Standing in opposite corners, noses pressed to the walls, were Canada and America.

Glancing at the both of them, England grinned. When children behaved badly, a spell in time out would always do the trick. Besides, it wasn't like they were going to chance pissing him off any further.

Because the last time HE checked, the trophy for biggest bitch belonged to him, thank you very much.

End


End file.
